What's Your Handicap? - Melody Beattie

"What's your handicap?" the golfer asked his partner.  "My childhood" said his companion.

Some handicaps are physical, certain limitations placed on our bodies.  Others are emotional, burdens of heartache from sad or abusive childhoods.   Others may be dealing with a current issue - perhaps facing a terminal illness or grieving an irreparable loss.

After losing my son, I found myself at a point where I simply could no longer stand the agony of waiting for my pain to disappear.  I knew that all my life I would miss him, and I became absolutely despondent.  There is no way out of this, I thought. I'm spending my life waiting for this paint o disappear so I can begin living my life again.  But the pain never will disappear.  And I'll never begin living my life again.  That's when a gentle idea began to change my life.

I began to understand that I was living and working with a handicap.  The loss would always be there.  The pain and heartache would always be present.  I could accept that, treat it like a handicap, and within that framework go ahead and live my life once more.

Many of us are living with handicaps.  Some will change over time, but other's won't.  If that's the case, stop waiting for your handicap to disappear.  Instead, decide to live with it.  Work around it.  Treat yourself with care and gentleness.  Allow yourself to feel and experience all of the limitations and emotions of your present situation.  Accept them.  Let them be part of you, part of your experience.

-Journey to the Heart.